The Last Continent

[pyrrhiccomedy]

Title: The Last Continent
Originally posted: Here, for wizzard890 as part of her reverse request post. Also, entirely coincidentally: happy birthday, Wizard! ♥ (And thank you erueru_2d for the translations and for answering all of my random questions. You're such a gem.)
Length: 2400 words.
Characters/Pairings: Antarctica OC; also England, Norway, America, Russia, France, and a slew of brief appearances from others.
Premise: Check it out, you guys! Antarctica!
Time period: 1908-2004.
Smuttiness: 0/10
Funnyness: 4/10
Wrist slashiness: 3/10
Lolhistoryness: 7/10
Violence: 0/10
Would I like it?: It's about an OC (possibly bad) and it has penguins in it (obviously good). It's up to you how you balance those things against each other.

---

1908

A lone figure descended the gangplank and stepped out onto the soundless white expanse of ice.

He said, "Jesus Christ fucking bloody hell it's cold here."

And then, a moment later, his hands braced on his hips, "Right, then. This bit's mine."

A small child who had almost blended into the snow tugged on his pant leg. "Um."

England jumped. He took a step back and peered over the high collar of his parka, down at a little white upturned face.

"Who are you?" he demanded after a few seconds.

The boy looked perplexed by the question. A frigid wind blew through them, and the boy didn't even flinch.

"Ah," England supplied. "Of course. Well. In that case, I suppose nobody would have told you, would they. You're Antarctica, my boy."

Antarctica shifted his feet in the snow. It covered him almost to his hips.

England patted his downy white hair in a vaguely paternal fashion. "Now, don't fret. I've done this plenty of times. You're a country, all right? Or--I suppose you might become one, in the fullness of time. And I'm England. I'm an empire."

England paused, apparently waiting for a response, and so Antarctica thought about it for a little while. He ventured, "Okay."

England kept waiting. Antarctica thought some more. "Um," he offered. Fidgeted. His hair dropped into his eyes. "I'm looking for my penguins."

England frowned. "Penguins?"

Antarctica nodded. "They're supposed to be here this time of year."

A little silence.

"But they're not," he added.

England stuffed his hands into his pockets and squinted out towards the pale blue horizon. "Er. Yes. Indeed."

Antarctica bit his little lip and gazed at the ground in an unfocused way. "Have you seen them?" he tried.

"No. That is--no, I haven't seen any penguins. Listen. I'm an empire, and that means I go about deciding that other countries belong to me. And I've decided that this is mine." He made a circular twirling gesture with one finger to indicate the surrounding wasteland.

Antarctica stared up at him blankly for a few seconds, and then his eyes widened, and he looked around England's knee at the waiting ship with an expression of dismay. "I-I don't want to go on the boat!"

"What?" England glanced over his shoulder at it. "Oh, don't be daft, boy, I'm not claiming all of you. Who needs that much ice? No," he asserted. "I just want this bit."

Antarctica cast about, his hands grabbing at something in the air that England couldn't see, and protested, "But my penguins come here!"

"Excellent," England replied. "Are they any good for eating, do you know?"

Antarctica stared up at him with enormous gray eyes for five seconds, and then he burst into tears.

"Oh, don't--sodding hell…don't cry, that's hardly necessary--"

"I don't like you!" Antarctica cried, and sat down hard in the snow.

England rubbed his forehead with the back of a gloved hand, and sighed to himself, "I'm so bloody sick of children."

---

1913

"Antarctica?" Norway stuck his head out the door and adjusted his cap. "Would you come inside for a moment?"

Antarctica looked up form welding sticks together with clumps of mud in the street of Grytviken, and clambered to his feet. He hopped up the stairs to the small log house and took Norway's hand.

Norway gave him an encouraging smile. "It's a very big day for the Jacobsen family." He led the little nation through the main room, past the fireplace. "And for you. I thought you might want to see."

Norway opened the bedroom door. Antarctica's eyes widened. He screamed.

There was an explosion of Norwegian from all the adults in the room, and Norway tugged on Antarctica's shoulder while Antarctica flattened his back against the wall.

"What is it?" he cried. "It's--it's--it's screaming!"

"Please, it's all right--" Norway threw a desperate look around the room. "I'm so sorry, everyone--"

"What's gotten into the boy?" the doctor demanded, half out of his chair.

"It's deformed!" Antarctica wailed.

"Antarctica--" Norway hushed.

"What is it!" The pallid, malformed little thing was squalling in the bedridden woman's arms.

"It's a baby," Norway urged.

Antarctica looked in a panic from the crying infant, to Norway, and back. "Wh-what?"

Norway exhaled and threw an apologetic grimace to the wide-eyed mother. He knelt in front of Antarctica and put his hands on the boy's slim shoulders. "A baby," he repeated softly. "A little girl. The Jacobsens' just had a little girl. Her name is Solveg."

Antarctica's heart rate gradually evened out. He wet his lips and stammered, "I-it's a person?"

"It's a little girl. A healthy little girl." Norway smiled a bit. "She's probably the first person ever born on your land. Isn't she?"

Antarctica nodded fervently. After another second, he peeled himself off the wall.

"She's not a very big person," he said doubtfully.

Norway exhaled on a laugh. "Maybe not, but she'll get bigger. Just like you."

---

1959

"Listen up, comrade, if you think for one second I'm gonna make any concessions to you, you've got another thing coming--"

"Typical belligerent posturing from a fat, stupid, whoring capitalist bastard--my requests are very reasonable--"

"Who are you calling fat?!"

"I don't know why everyone is fighting," Antarctica fretted. He huddled over a desk in the middle of the room, a book tucked against his chest, while sixteen angry nations shouted over his head.

"Nobody recognizes your claim," Argentina snarled, and stabbed his finger into Chile's chest.

Chile smacked his hand aside. "Nobody recognizes yours either, you stupid fuck, not since you dropped it right over mine--"

"And mine," England cut in. "Which, I must say--"

"I-I mean it's not like I really have anything useful." Antarctica tugged his feet up onto the chair with him, and nudged up his enormous, round glasses.

"You're the plus size, here, asshole--"

"Esli b vokrug ne bylo svideteley, klyanus' ya by nachistil tebe mordu--"

"Speak in a real fuckin' language!"

"I guess there's a bit of oil and things," Antarctica writhed, "But it's all trapped under the, um, the ice."

"I should have known you would be unable to put aside your pride for the sake of science." Russia leaned over the table, while South Africa and Belgium tried to hold him back.

"I don't see what a crate full of Dragunovs has to do with science--" America strained against New Zealand and Japan.

"Y-you know, like everything else," Antarctica concluded miserably.

"Would you all shut up!" France snapped.

"He wants to bring guns to the South Pole!" America jerked his chin at Russia.

"I would only use them to shoot your incompetent spies." Russia shook off his captors and glared.

"Well, I've got a bit of a problem with that! --And my spies are not incompetent! --Not that I'm spying!"

A brief, discomfited silence followed that assertion. Russia smirked. Antarctica blinked like a startled owl as he thought of something, and piped up brightly, "Although I do have over seven hundred species of extremophile phytoplankton!"

America blinked, squinted, refocused, furrowed his eyebrows, then looked at Antarctica and managed, "What?"

"And about fifty different kinds of bryophytes," he chirped.

"…What?"

"The only company he has is that of our scientists," France sighed. "Would everyone please be quiet? You are embarrassing yourselves. It is not even as if any of this territory is strategically important."

Antarctica looked crestfallen, until Norway rest a hand on his small shoulder and whispered, "That's a good thing for you."

"I am sure we can come up with some civilized arrangement." France stroked a lock of hair over his shoulder.

America had by that point collected himself. He jerked his thumb at Russia, who looked prepared to bite it off. "I'll make a civilized arrangement out of his face if he tries to give his scientists sniper rifles."

"I would give anything for you to try it," Russia murmured.

"Hey, any time, any place, pal--"

"Kogda ty budesh moim, ya s udovolstviem i navsegda vyshibu etu ulybku s tvoego litsa."

"Oh, you smartass son of a bitch--" America lunged for him.

France leaned back in his chair and looked out the window. Antarctica opened his book. He was fourteen chapters into Carbon Cycle in the Arctic Seas. He pushed up his glasses again.

---

1982

Antarctica saw England advancing across the ice, and panicked.

"You can't have them!" he leapt to his feet, dove for the nearest baby penguin--they stood in the thick of thousands of them--and threw his arms around it. The penguin squeaked, spun, and they both toppled over.

England ran forward and tried to pull the boy up, only to be fought off with flailing legs and flippers.

"Go away!' Antarctica kicked.

"Antarctica--Antarctica, do calm down--" England got hold of Antarctica's arm and yanked him half upright. Antarctica clung to the baby penguin with his other arm so tightly that he had a mouth and face full of fluff.

"They're my penguins!" he shouted.

"Relax, would you--"

"Leave them alone!"

"No one's going to touch your bloody penguins, calm down!" England snapped. He gave up untangling the young nation from the excited bird, and let Antarctica curl up around his new friend. "That's what I've come to tell you, in fact."

Antarctica scowled at him, those wintry eyes full of suspicion.

England blew out a breath. "The chaps and I all got together," he explained, "And we agreed to designate your penguins a protected species. Along with all your other wildlife. So stop carrying on."

Antarctica was still for a few seconds. He wiped his nose with the back of his hand, then cautiously sat up. The penguin rolled onto its stomach and puffed out with a little trill. "You mean it?" he asked, guarded.

"I'm entirely in earnest," England confirmed. He blinked when Antarctica lunged up and hugged his knee ecstatically.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!"

England shook his leg gingerly to dislodge him. Antarctica took a step back and beamed. "Yes, well," England mustered. He examined the penguin. The penguin waggled its flippers and canted its head at him.

England scratched his neck below his scarf, looked away, looked back, colored a shade, and muttered, "Do…you suppose it would let me pet it…?"

Antarctica's eyes shone. "You like them, too?!"

"I…that is…so long as I'm already here…" he trailed off weakly.

"Mm, mm-hmm! Go ahead! They're not scared of people, yet! Not these ones!" He demonstrated by crouching next to the fluffy little bird and rubbing its back. It squeaked happily.

England hesitated, adjusted his coat, then hobbled down to one knee. He fumbled off a glove and extended his hand carefully towards the penguin.

It bit him.

---

2000

Antarctica walked into the Submillimeter Telescope and Remote Observatory Project headquarters to find America, Australia, and New Zealand standing around a dead body.

He stopped. "Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh--"

"Shit," America swore. He took Antarctica by the hand and steered him back into the hallway. Antarctica craned his neck until the corpse disappeared from view, unable to look away.

"Wh-what happened to him?" he turned pleading eyes up towards America, who knelt in front of him. "Did--did the heat go out?"

"No…" America bit his lip and appeared to struggle with himself.

"W-was it my fault?" Antarctica started to shake. "I-I don't mean to make it so cold! I just, I just--"

"No--no, sweetie--it wasn't the heat. It's not your fault." America rubbed Antarctica's arm.

Antarctica stared over America's shoulder, wide-eyed. "He--I liked him. Just, just yesterday he was telling me about electromagnetic induction, and, and he w-would give me candies…" he pushed up his glasses and turned his gaze back on America. "What happened?"

America exhaled. "It's…too soon to say for sure, but…but it looks like he was murdered."

Antarctica trembled. "I-I don't understand."

America squeezed his arm comfortingly. "I don't, either. He was a good scientist, a good worker…he got along with everyone on the base…"

Antarctica interrupted with a shake of his head and an increasingly lost expression. "N-no, I-I mean--I don't understand...what's murder?"

---

2004

Antarctica stood on the hill at Bellinghausen Station and blinked at the ornate wooden building.

"It's a church," Russia explained.

Well, Antarctica understood that part, but-- "Why?"

"For your spiritual improvement." Russia folded his arms and examined the little tower.

The young nation didn't know what to say to that.

"Now, I expect you to attend Divine Liturgy every Sunday," Russia went on. "It's only an hour, so I know you can find time from your studies for it."

"But…" Antarctica bit his lip, doubtful. "Won't it all be in Russian?"

Russia frowned down at him. "Haven't you been practicing your Russian?"

"W-well…yes, but--"

"Actually, it's in Church Slavonic," Russia reflected. "But you will adjust to it."

Antarctica dropped his eyes to the ground.

"And of course you will need to learn the Stolpovoy Raspev--"

Antarctica's lips moved. "Column…hymn?" he faltered.

A glance. "Close enough. It has thirty-two parts, so you may want to begin with the--"

Antarctica blinked, pushed up his glasses, and tugged on the hem of Russia's coat to get his attention. "But why?" he repeated.

Russia tugged his scarf a bit tighter. "All Russians know the Stolpovoy Raspev."

"That's not what I--" Antarctica stopped, consternated. "Wait, but--I'm not even Russian!"

"Not yet," Russia agreed. A high, thin breeze swept in off the South Sea and ruffled their coats and pale hair.

Antarctica grimaced. "Nuh-uh…at that big shouty meeting, all of you agreed not to take any more bits of me."

"For as long as the treaty remains in effect," Russia concurred. "But things change. Brazil has reserved the right to make a claim. Peru has reserved the right to make a claim. America has reserved the right to make a claim…"

Antarctica's mouth twisted up like he tasted something foul. "And you did, too, huh?" his little jaw set.

"Naturally, I reserved the right to claim territory discovered by Russians." Russia patted Antarctica's head absently, and turned back down the hill.

"So…so what…" Antarctica made fists at his sides. "So you mean, like, King George Island?"

Russia tossed a smile back over his shoulder. "I mean the entire continent."

Antarctica gaped, twitching, as Russia strolled down towards the research center.

Russia called to him without looking: "Keep practicing your Russian!"


<sub>---

--Great Britain made the first official Antarctic territorial claim in 1903.

--Solveg Gunbjørg Jacobsen was the first person ever born in Antarctica, on October 8, 1913.

--The Antarctic Treaty, signed in 1959 and going into effect in 1961, established freedom of scientific investigation and banned military activity on the continent. Argentina, Australia, Belgium, Chile, France, Japan, New Zealand, Norway, South Africa, the Soviet Union, the United Kingdom, and the United States were the original signatories.

--The Convention for the Conservation of Antarctic Marine Living Resources guaranteed the preservation of the Antarctic biosphere in 1982.

--Australian Rodney David Marks, an astrophysicist, died May 12, 2000, from methanol poisoning, while working on an American research base for the Smithsonian Institute. This was covered as 'Antarctica's first murder.'

--Trinity Church, at Bellinghausen Station, was established February 4, 2004, and is the southernmost Orthodox religious building in the world. You can see a picture of it here.

--This is a baby emperor penguin.</sub>

Comments

[youkofujima.livejournal.com]

LOL penguins! I love penguins!

*tries to be coherent*

That said, this fic was very heart-warming (was that a pun) and extremely cute, and somehow I saw a little bit of Canada in Antarctica, for some reason. Very adorable, and so innocent.

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Huh, I hadn't made the Canada connection, but I can totally see it. He's very unprepossessing.

I'm glad you liked it!

[fallenxembers17.livejournal.com]

...he's... he's adorable!

I love how Norway is so sweet to him, and Russia's all, hehe, you'll be one with me soon. Bahh, this was cute, I was giggling most of the time. Poor Antarctica, all divided up by these nations that hate each other.

Antarctica interrupted with a shake of his head and an increasingly lost expression. "N-no, I-I mean--I don't understand...what's murder?"

I d'awwwww'd.

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

I'm delighted you enjoyed it! =D Poor little Antarctica is right. I wasn't making up that last bit about how Russia's proposed claim potentially refers to the entire continent. XD

[miss-chella.livejournal.com]

D'aww, Antarctica!! He's so cute and geeky and so utterly utterly concerned about his penguins! It's the cutest thing EVER. No wonder all the nations want him, he's such a cutie-pie. I love that you gave him those round glasses. And I love some more how everybody is fighting for him at the "big shouty meeting" Oh, god, I want to take this kid and squeeze the life out of him. He's too cute. And so innocent! He didn't know what murder or babies are, and does he know anything other than ultra-geeky aminal stuff? Cutesy! So, so cute!!
America called him sweetie. Guh! Adorable!
England can't get a break, Ever. I approve of this.
Russia has such a way with children. I bet that he gave Antarctica his first Nightmare.
Wow, that was kind of rambly. Point is, this was incredible.

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

I WANT MORE GEEKY COUNTRIES. And if any country is going to be a huge nerd, it's got to be Antarctica. His yearly population is like, 90% scientists! With his giant glasses...I want to draw him or something. XD

Thank you for reading! =D

I'll just write things as I read...

[animedutchess.livejournal.com]

"Are they any good for eating, do you know?"

ENGLAND. YOU FAIL SO HARD. You do not ask the little child if their cute friends are tasty! XP

"It's deformed!" Antarctica wailed.

Oh God Antartica. You make me lol. ^^

England scratched his neck below his scarf, looked away, looked back, colored a shade, and muttered, "Do…you suppose it would let me pet it…?"

NO ONE CAN RESIST THE CUTE, ENGLAND.

"No--no, sweetie--it wasn't the heat. It's not your fault."

America is like a mommy deep down. He IS. We all know it. XP

Russia tossed a smile back over his shoulder. "I mean the entire continent."

Of course you do, Russia.

...Alright. This was fun and cute and AWESOME. Antartica is a cute little science nerd with penguins and glasses...it suits him! I loves it! ^^

Re: I'll just write things as I read...

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Yay, I'm so happy to hear it! Little kid nerds are just, I don't know. I can't resist. XD

[zesquivailence.livejournal.com]

ohjeez, that kid is so innocent and cute and ugh. ; 3 ; The bits of history you included in the timeline are pretty amazing and are contributing to my recommended daily dose of edutainment.

I kind of had to draw out that scene with england...
http://i841.photobucket.com/albums/zz334/cheapnugly/anartican.png

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Ohmigosh! Art! Thank you so much! =D =D England's expression is so perfect. XD

And yeah, like, I actually know shit about Antarctica now. God love this fandom and the weird things it makes me learn. XD

[kaizykat.livejournal.com]

I was beginning to think that I was the only person with an Antarctica OC. XD

That being said, the fic was really cute. I loved the part with England and the baby penguin.

"These don't know to be afraid of humans"

"Oh... Okay..."

CHOMP

XD

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you so much! ♥

[fujiappletan.livejournal.com]

"I would only use them to shoot your incompetent spies."
burnnn BURNNN.

antartica was so cute! i love his... love for his penguins.

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

What the hell is with that icon? XD Is there a story behind that? I must know.

Antarctica + penguins = best friends for life.

[souleater411.livejournal.com]

PFFT. How endlessly adorable. One thing I must note.

"No. That is--no, I haven't seen any penguins. Listen. I'm an empire, and that means I go about deciding that other countries belong to me. And I've decided that this is mine."

I DIED. 8D OH, ENGLAND. WOE IS YOU.

Anyways, I really like your Antarctica! He's so cute. Especially loved the human birth bit. Pfft. So funny. :3

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Awww, thank you! I'm kinda attached to the kid now, to be honest. XD

[minuiko.livejournal.com]

Oh man. Half of this I found extremely cute and funny. I mean, penguins make everything better, and that bit about England being such an insensitive terrible dad was amazing. But there's this sinister undercurrent running through it, and it's chilling. I mean, it's colonization all over again, the corruption of an innocent virgin country. Especially that bit about Antarctica's first encounter with murder. I liked it (perhaps better for the creepiness), especially the America/Russia bickering xD.

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Oh, sweet, I'm so psyched you picked up on the sinister undercurrent. It was probably my favorite thing about all this. There's no way Antarctica can stay happy and innocent, not when so many countries have their hooks in him. It's just a question of how long it's going to last. (And climate change is probably going to reduce his penguin population by 80% over the next fifty years. That was too depressing to even put in the fic. He's going to cry and cry. ._.)

America/Russia bickering remains my favorite thing to write, yeah. XD

[littleduchess.livejournal.com]

"You're Antarctica, my boy." I don't know why, but that had me laughing my arse off- for some reason I imagined a stiff-backed Edwardian England, looking over his monocle as he said this. :D

Lol at 1959, 2000 is heart-breaking and I found something about 2004 to be really sad and ominous and unfinished...

Bless, he's so *innocent*!

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Pfffhahahaha. Early 1900s England is just like that. XD

[buddha-loves-me.livejournal.com]

Awww this is really cute. In my head, I always pictured that Antarctica-tan would actually be a... penguin. Since there weren't people who natively lived there. But having Antarctica be a boy who loves penguins is just as adorable, if not more so.

Good job, it was a fun read. :)

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Well, I thought about what England and France said when they first found America, you know? This little white kid, waiting for them from before there were any white people on the continent (my headcanon states that Cherokee nation, Five Lodges nations, the Iroqois, etc all had their own nation-tans that weren't related to our America). They were like "He's not really a nation--he's more like what you get before you have nations."

So I think that's what Antarctica is. He's not a nation, but he could potentially become one.

[sadlygrove.livejournal.com]

England stuffed his hands into his pockets and squinted out towards the pale blue horizon. "Er. Yes. Indeed."

Christ, England, always the prime parent.

This was great--I loved how you characterized Antarctica! Still new to things that seem so common for other nations and a love for science--and penguins! Oh, lord, England-biting penguins ♥ I love how England's tsundere even around penguins; something about cute, tiny things, hm, England?


Oh--and America being indignant over 'fat' out of all Russia's insults! They're still so wonderful together, even when they're ripping at each others' throats :3

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

I love how England's tsundere even around penguins

Oh, GOD--I totally didn't think of it in those terms, but that's exactly what it is. XD England, you're so freaking fail.

I'm so glad you liked it!

[mangaka-chan.livejournal.com]

So sweet~! Baby penguins! I love how Antarctica is so geeky since it's population consist mostly of scientists (though with global warming the way it is, it just might become the new must-go-to place for summer vacation in the next century >>). Norway being so gentle with Antarctica is so cute. I think it would've been interesting to see Antarctica meet Australia since they're the only two countries in the world who are also continents (though I don't think Antarctica is technically a country, is it?)

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Gosh, I would've liked to have introduced Australia and Antarctica, but Aussie-tan still doesn't have a hint of a personality yet. =/ Maybe someday!

And no, Antarctica isn't technically a nation, yet. Everyone who lives in Antarctica is a citizen of an already established country, and Antarctica has no government or system of law. He's like America when the Europeans first found him: "what you get before you get countries," I think is how England put it.

[inner-wings.livejournal.com]

Oh god, Antarctica sounds like the cutest widdle thing EVER. *-* And fail!daddy England is always hilarious and awesome (as is America and Russia bickering. I'll never get enough of that.) But as cute as this whole thing was, it's so bittersweet to think of how things are getting worse and worse for him these days (global warming seems even more heartbreaking now. D: )

But now I really want to watch March of the Penguins again. :D He probably helped France make it, too ('You want to make a movie? About my penguins? :D')

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Ohmigosh, he totally did! He was all hopping along ahead of France, burbling happily about mating cycles and depth of fat insulation.

[wizzard890.livejournal.com]

So I got some pretty awesome shit for my birthday.

But I can say that, without a doubt, this is the awesomest shit of all.

God, I don't even know where to start


"I'm so bloody sick of children."

Jesus, England. How can someone suck so badly at parenting and still be allowed to raise two of their own? And of course, of course the first thing the imperialistic bastard asks poor Antarctica is if penguins can be eaten.

And oh, Norway being sweet to Antarctica...Honestly, I was so thrilled to see that, because I wouldn't trust him with any of these other nations. At all.

"--And my spies are not incompetent! --Not that I'm spying!"

Ah, Cold War-era bitching. It's like a cherry on top of a perfect sundae of a fic. (Yeah, so that metaphor sounded way better in my head.)

I could probably just quote this whole thing back at you, fangirling over every other line, but I really want to say that I adored this fic, not just because of the lolhistory-ness, or the adorable, geeky perfection that is Antarctica, but because of how fucking sinister it was. Like. Antarctica being introduced to murder, courtesy of the other nations, ignored during discussions concerning his own continent, and slowly but surely being surrounded by, well, everyone. And the worst thing about it is that the nations' desire to cut out a piece of the pie is nothing more than a huge, international pissing contest. There's really no resources to go after, and scientists from all countries have a free pass already. They don't want anything except to stomp all over this poor kid, just to prove that they can.

But all that goes on in subtext. Because you're brilliant. ILU. For serious. ♥♥♥

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

And oh, Norway being sweet to Antarctica...Honestly, I was so thrilled to see that, because I wouldn't trust him with any of these other nations. At all.

God, I had NO IDEA what to do with Norway when I started this--like, he has this loooong-ass history in Antarctica, but he has no canon personality, you know? XD So I just decided that his little character art looks sweet-natured, and went from there. I'm glad Antarctica had a nice older brother figure!

Ah, Cold War-era bitching. It's like a cherry on top of a perfect sundae of a fic.

I knew this would be appreciated. XD

And the worst thing about it is that the nations' desire to cut out a piece of the pie is nothing more than a huge, international pissing contest.

Yyyyep. Antarctica even points it out himself: there's nothing fucking here. (Well, he thinks his phytoplankton is pretty exciting, but nobody else seems to agree...) It's just a dick swinging competition; everybody has to get a piece of this kid, just because he's there. And if Russia gets a piece, then America wants a bigger piece. And so on...

At least everybody agreed to help look after his penguins. =/ Hahaha, on a "making of this fic" trivia note, I totally bombarded Eru with like a zillion questions about Orthodox church services. Just all, when do people go? What's it called? Is there singing? What hymns do they sing? What language is it in? Etc etc etc...and then a day later, I'm like "I need these really insulting lines translated into Russian" (I kind of enjoy not translating the Russian back when Russia is obviously just speaking Russian in order to get away with being more insulting when nobody can understand him--I hope that worked all right?). She translates, and sends me a message all "...This fic sounds really scary. ._." XD

[ladyrandomness.livejournal.com]

ANTARCTICA. He's ADORABLE, and I can just picture him cooing over little baby penguins and feeding the ones who's mommies died. I personally love well-done OC's. :3 My favorite part was the last one with Russia. He's so convinced the poor kid is already one with him. ("Haven't you been practicing your Russian" made me DIE.)

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Even Antarctica will become one with Russia. 'Cause hey, Russia's not fazed by the idea of more ice. XD

[musubi7.livejournal.com]

The last part was hilarious! XD

"Now, I expect you to attend Divine Liturgy every Sunday," Russia went on. "It's only an hour, so I know you can find time from your studies for it."

"But…" Antarctica bit his lip, doubtful. "Won't it all be in Russian?"

When I read this I was like, "Go to Catholic Mass! You can get it in English!!"


Then I facepalmed because that's not what this part was about at all....>___>

Russia/America bickering=win always. XD Good work as always *thumbs up*

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

There actually is a Catholic chapel in Antarctica! It's in Belgrano II Station, the Argentine base, and it's made entirely out of ice. How cool is that?! Unfortunately, I wasn't able to find a picture of it. =/

One thing I find really cool is that, like--so Orthodox services are usually held in Church Slavonic, right? (I love having a consultant when I need to know things like this. >_> I don't think I'd even write so much Russia if it weren't for the fact that I can mine Eru for interesting details. XD) But because Bellinghausen Station is near a Chilean base and an Argentine base, they also sometimes hold services in Spanish! And a bunch of South American scientists have converted to Russian Orthodoxy while they were working in Antarctica! I think that's kind of awesome.

[mad-bomber75.livejournal.com]

Your Antarctica is ADORABLE <3333 I can't really pick a favorite scene here...but I did love the part where England wanted to pet the penguin and it bit him XD Such is his life.

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Yep, it pretty much had to happen that way. XD In England's life, there is a time for tsun tsun, a time for dere dere, and a time to get hilariously shot down in response to the dere dere. It's an endless cycle.

[luxnigra.livejournal.com]

"Are they any good for eating, do you know?" ahahahah! Roast penguin: an english delicacy...and I want to try it! XD

Your Antartica is like a little, cute boy; a little man who is all glasses and science books and penguins (who are friends more reliable than Nations). But he seems to be destined to remain "little": he can't grow, he can't become stronger because he is the ice-cream cake of the other countries.
Besides, I agree with youkofujima: I also think that Antartica is a bit like Canada ^^ They can change me into a cuddle-machine! XD

"And my spies are not incompetent! --Not that I'm spying!": oh Alfred! now I know why James Bond isn't american... -___-

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

But he seems to be destined to remain "little": he can't grow, he can't become stronger because he is the ice-cream cake of the other countries.

Yeah...although, I mean, if you think about it--it's not inconceivable that Antarctica might one day become a small, self-governing state. Energy efficiency technology is making it possible for more and more people to comfortably live down there, without causing illegal disturbances to the environment. If they manage to find resources to make full-time settlement economically worthwhile, Antarctica might be able to support a small population, trading whatever it's got for food and fuel. And Lord knows the people at the various bases would quickly start to feel like they had more in common with each other than they did the people who lived in their native countries. I can see them banding together and asking for a measure of autonomy and self-governance.

You can become a real nation someday, Antarctica! I believe in you! ♥♥♥

oh Alfred! now I know why James Bond isn't american... -___-

HE IS SO BAD AT THIS. XD Especially compared to Russia, who is obviously the best at it. It's almost kind of endearing, in a really jerksome way.

[ghostofthemotif.livejournal.com]

Oh England... such a fail!parent. Shows up, immediately claims land, and then asks to eat the kid's only friends. He so smart.

"Typical belligerent posturing from a fat, stupid, whoring capitalist bastard--my requests are very reasonable--"

"Who are you calling fat?!"

Right. Because that's the insult you should be offended by, America XD Dear Lord, that whole scene was priceless. Especially the "Oh you smartass son of a bitch..." response to Russia not speaking english.

I love your Antartica <3 He's such a sweetheart. I just want to cuddle him. And he's a genius... Dang, I never thought about what it would happen if their entire population was made up of scientists D:

As for how all the other nations (except Norway) were treating him... Poor baby, that must be so awful @_@ Like being the rope in tug-of-war, but not undestanding the point, because hey... you're just a rope, so what do they want? /really hoping that made sense.

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Right. Because that's the insult you should be offended by, America XD

It was a cheap shot on my part, but what can I say, I love cheap shots. You can afford more of them! XD

Like being the rope in tug-of-war, but not undestanding the point, because hey... you're just a rope, so what do they want?

Yeah; that's a really good analogy, actually. Because the rope is not inherently valuable, or anything. But everyone still wants to make sure that they have more rope than the next guy. Especially if the next guy is Russia, and you're America. Fuck him, he doesn't get any rope.

And Antarctica's all like, "...Plankton? =o"

At least he has Norway. And his penguins.

[djsoliloquy.livejournal.com]

I’ve now have had the singular and enjoyable experience of having a Hetalia fic narrated in my head by God Morgan Freeman. Jacques Cousteau covered the footnotes. Awesome.

Antarctica! Oh England ;3 And he probably has no idea why it is the children cry, too. Although, I suppose when you’re an empire(/anyone besides Antarctica in the fic) you also just don’t have to give a damn concerning someone who can’t say no.

I just wanted to hug Antarctica and invite him to my house and give him cookies and knit him little hats when he offered his extremophile phytoplankton. Adorable. So then it’s just that much more creepy when he’s gradually stripped of that childlike innocence :( But the good with the bad… I kind of aww’d about the big brothering going on with Norway.

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

I’ve now have had the singular and enjoyable experience of having a Hetalia fic narrated in my head by God Morgan Freeman. Jacques Cousteau covered the footnotes.

PFFHAHAHahahahaha!!

*goes back and re-reads to do the same*

you also just don’t have to give a damn concerning someone who can’t say no.

Hey, now, give them a little credit! They've all grown up a tiny bit from the old days of colonization. No military activity, agreeing to protect his environment, and so on. They're all truly, abysmally shitty parents, but it's not like the kid's getting the school of hard knocks treatment, either.

But...yes, their small measure of decency aside, creepy and sinister, what ho.

(Norway has no canonical personality, as far as I know, but I decided that anybody who wears a hat like that must be kindly.)

[hueha.livejournal.com]

This, this, why is this so perfect? In every single way I can think of?

I think I'm going to kidnap Antarctica. And, ugh, the "murder" part. So adorable. And sad. ;_;

This was fantastic, if you didn't get that.

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! It was a lot of fun to write, but it's always touch and go with OCs, you know? XD I'm really glad Antarctica's hit the right chord of 'adorable nerd who's more or less doomed' for people.

[bridgetsmidge18.livejournal.com]

*sigh* What can I say that hasn't already been said? Idk, but your description of Antarctica is wonderfulness (I LOVE CUTE LITTLE NERDY BOYS WITH BIG GLASSES TOO, LOL XD).

It was also interesting how France was the voice of reason during the Antarctic Treaty negotiations (and of course that whole scene between Russia and America was great :D). And I guess with him being the voice of reason, that doesn't say much about the rest of them, now does it? Noooope.

And I adore penguins too :3... oh, and your version of England is probably my favorite out of all the fanfics I've read. I mean, I love the guy, but I wish more people would depict him as the arrogant, stuffy, imperialistic jerk that he was ("Right then. This bit's mine," and "Listen. I'm an empire, and that means I go about deciding that other countries belong to me." Oh England... ilu <3).

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

(I LOVE CUTE LITTLE NERDY BOYS WITH BIG GLASSES TOO, LOL XD).

WELL WHAT IS NOT TO LOVE, I MEAN COME ON NOW.

It was also interesting how France was the voice of reason during the Antarctic Treaty negotiations

Well, but if you think about Hetalia canon, that's always what France does! In the Great Depression bit, he was the one to be like "Look, we can't just sit around shouting at America, we need to come up with a plan." And when all the Allies started bickering over how they'd divide up the Axis' territory after the war, he was like "Don't we have more important things to do than argue about this? (Like fix your hideous uniforms!)" France is pretty good at the whole eyeroll, heavy sigh, "you're all being such children" act. XD

your version of England is probably my favorite out of all the fanfics I've read.

Oh, gosh, thank you! That's such a sweet thing for you to say! =D

[hirakareta-sama.livejournal.com]

Why is Russia so awesome? Like why does he just steal the show whenever he shows up? And Antarctica is cute in it's purest of forms and should be bottled up and sold. World peace anyone?

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Like why does he just steal the show whenever he shows up?

Because the show will become one with Russia.

I'm so happy you enjoyed it! I wish I had more excuses to write about adorable little kids, to be honest. XD

[hi-no-neko.livejournal.com]

(so, i'm not going to say this)

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, Antarctica, you are, he is, that be, ohmygodsosoveryverycute. <3

(because i don't want to get sniped by the pun-hunter)

Can I just say that it's perfect how he had to ask the other nations to explain babies/murder - wow, there's a juxtaposition for you - and how all his "why?"-asking goes so perfectly with his being a little scientist junior?

(aw, to hell with it, i'm saying it anyways)

Norway, why so sweet? England, why so fail? Russia, why so . . . Russia?

(this antarctica fic gave me chills)

*shot*

[pyrrhiccomedy.livejournal.com]

Your terrible puns are always welcome here. ♥ I love bad puns, actually. The worse they are, the more I love them. Have you ever heard any "Hey What Do You Call A Guy" jokes? I love these fucking things. Here, let me give you a sample:

Hey, what do you call a guy in a pile of leaves.

...

...

Russel.

GET IT? GET IT?

Oh my God, I know a million of these.

What do you call a guy floating on the surface of a lake?

Bob.

What do you call a guy at the bottom of a hole?

Doug.

What do you call the guy who put him there?

Barry.

I AM NOT EVEN KIDDING ABOUT HOW FUNNY I FIND THIS SHIT.

o.o